Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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