KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
did i just pee glitter
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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