I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize
