Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
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