Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Randomize
