I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
