Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
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