I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
