Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
