You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
