You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
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