You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
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