dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
i think i have herpe
just one?
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Randomize
