Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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