i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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