dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
