you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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