If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
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