her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I will be naked everywhere
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Randomize
