What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
