I wish I only lived at night.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
