So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Randomize
