he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
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