Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
