I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
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