I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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