No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
