yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize
