he shaved USA in his pubs
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Randomize
