Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
