Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Randomize
