No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
