and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
