do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Randomize
