My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
So here I am, sexting at work.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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