If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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