Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I'm bleeding and have questions
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
