All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
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