I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I believe in your delicious
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Randomize
