I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
You smell like stripper and shame
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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