not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
