i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
