My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize