Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize