i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Randomize
