You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
