first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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