the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
