I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
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