so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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